I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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