I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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