You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
