I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
