the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
