I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
