okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
