I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
