How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
