Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
