when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
