Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
