Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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