This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
only if we run a train.
done.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
