I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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