remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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