Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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