Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
smell my finger.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
