sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
