spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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