Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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