And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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