you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize