Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
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