i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
