He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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