I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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