just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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