I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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