Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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