glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I need help removing her.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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