Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize