Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
That reminds me...we need to get swords
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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