I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
