Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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