it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
