Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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