My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
