Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
