Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
