so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
it glows. i had to have it.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I have post one night stand depression
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