Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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