I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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