No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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