quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
