I must be too annoying 4 u.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
