As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize