no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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