Yo dont text me then not text me
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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