This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
